Victor Noir: dead for over 150 years – still a sex god


victor noir

Commissioned to produce a bronze statue for the grave of Victor Noir, sculptor Jules Dalou depicted the murdered journalist with partially unbuttoned trousers and an impressive bulge.

An impressive bulge? Who cares, one might ask. It’s not the size that counts!

Except that the physical evidence of Victor Noir’s bronze effigy indicates that countless admirers were — and are — impressed by the idea of a big dick.

Legend has it that intimate contact with Victor’s well-endowed likeness will lead to sexual happiness and increased fertility.

Consequently, numerous lips and inner thighs have grazed the crotch of Victor’s bronze effigy. Enough to rub bare the greenish patina from the bronze, leaving a patch of polished metal.

Kissing or sitting on the monument’s face is also popular. Victor’s lips, chin and nose shine nakedly amidst the more typical tarnish of almost 150 years of oxidisation.

Articles about the lust-crazed phenomenon tend to focus on female admirers hoping to enhance their sex life or fertility.

Female admirers have included Dita von Teese 

 

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But Instagram reveals plenty of male visitors wanting a quick grope

 

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Who was Victor Noir?

So what did Victor Noir do to inspire such lust?

He was certainly not famed in his lifetime for his sexual prowess. No Cassanova. Nor even a Rasputin, notorious for a horse-sized dick.

He was a mere apprentice journalist, 21 years old and unknown to all but family and friends.

However, in January 1870, a cousin of the Emperor of France challenged Victor’s editor to a duel. The editor sent Victor and a workmate to negotiate the details of the duel, but everything turned to shit. Prince Pierre Bonaparte shot Victor dead.

Originally buried in his hometown, Victor Noir was remembered two decades later as a martyr to the reign of Emperor Napoleon III. His body was moved to the Père Lachaise Cemetery in Paris, and Jules Dalou tasked with sculpting a statue to rest above his grave.

Dalou depicted the young martyr at the moment of his death, flat on the ground with his top hat at his side.

And with his partially unbuttoned pants highlighting a substantial bulge. 🍆

And so a legend was born. For the last half-century, believers have been kissing, fondling, groping and simulating sex atop the bronze statue. Surely more libidinous excitement per square centimetre than any other patch of cemetery in the world.

Authorities tried to bring an unhappy ending to the endless pleasure in 2004 by fencing off the grave and erecting a sign.

“Any damage caused by graffiti or indecent rubbing will be prosecuted.”

However, indecent rubbing won out. Protests erupted, the fence and sign were torn down, and normal activities resumed.

The Père Lachaise Cemetery

The Victor Noir grave and associated legend is camp as tits, but the Père Lachaise Cemetery is also famous for some quite remarkable queer residents:

Oscar Wilde

Colette

Gertrude Stein

Chopin

Rosa Bonheur (buried with her two female ‘life companions’.)

More sexy statues:

Cum all ye faithful: heritage listed x-rated church porn.

x-rated church porn
Image: Reddit

Oh David, the urges you awakened!

David

NSFW! Auguste Neyt, the model for The Bronze Age by Rodin.

rodin the bronze age auguste neyt

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Destiny Rogers

Destiny Rogers embarked on her career in the media industry immediately after high school, initially joining Mirror News, which later evolved into News Ltd. She fondly recalls editing Ian Byford's 'Passing Glances: A History of Gay Cairns' as one of her most fulfilling projects. Additionally, Destiny co-researched and co-wrote 'The Queen's Ball', chronicling the history of the world's longest-running continuous queer event. Her investigative work on the history of Australia's COON Cheese and Edward Coon culminated in the publication 'COON: More Holes than Swiss Cheese', a collaborative effort with Dr. Stephen Hagan. Destiny's journey at QNews began as a feature writer, and she was subsequently elevated to the role of Managing Editor of QNews Magazine in 2018. However, in July 2022, she decided to resign from this role to refocus on research and feature writing. For contact, please reach out at destinyr@qnews.com.au.

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