Tom the Whistleblower outed over outing parliamentary wanker

Tom the Whistleblower parliamentary wanker

Earlier today, Channel 9 newspapers outed the gay man who calls himself Tom the Whistleblower over his outing of Canberra’s gay parliamentary wanker. The self-titled whistleblower shared images with the media of the parliamentary wanker masturbating.

Tom the Whistleblower

We all know politics is full of wankers. And lots of people film themselves masturbating. Indeed, some earn a living from it. But one, in particular, hit the headlines recently.

The Liberal Party fired a gay staffer following the release of images showing him masturbating in Parliament House. Obviously a serious workplace offence and worthy of dismissal. Worse still, the video showed the man cumming on a female MP’s desk. This, in the midst of ongoing revelations of the appalling treatment of women in the federal halls of power.

Tom the Whistleblower previously hooked up with the man seen in the images. Although that occurred five years ago, the pair continued to share images of other sexual encounters for some time. The Whistleblower also admitted he himself had sexual encounters with Liberal staffers inside the Parliament House meditation room.

Apparently, the meditation room has long enjoyed renown as the place occupants of Parliament House go to participate in horizontal folk-dancing and other non-meditative pursuits. Some do fall to their knees, but not in prayer.

Media outlets say Tom the Whistleblower offered to provide images of Liberal staffers engaged in oral sex inside parliamentary offices last November. The Ten Network’s Peter Van Onselen took up the story following Samantha Maiden’s reporting on the Brittany Higgins rape allegations.

Don’t cum back here

The government quickly dismissed the parliamentary wanker despite the perception of a relative lack of constructive action regarding the Brittany Higgins allegations and the allegations against Attorney-General Christian Porter. The parliamentary wanker is unlikely to find further employment in federal politics. Though… much the same was said about James Ashby following the Slipper hullabaloo. In politics, there can be life after death.

Despite the ongoing controversy over the alleged rape of Brittany Higgins, there has been no public acknowledgement of any action against her alleged rapist. Despite multiple assertions on social media that the Liberal Party or Hillsong spirited the alleged rapist of Brittany Higgins to the US, QNews believes he remains in Australia.

Although it appears Christian Porter will never achieve his dream of becoming Prime Minister, His immediate future in the federal Cabinet seems assured, though probably in a less prominent role.

Meanwhile, Peta Credlin’s allegations of gay sex orgies during question time and Ministers bringing rent boys into Parliament House remain unsubstantiated. Credlin made the allegations following the publication of the images provided by Tom the Whistleblower.

Look over there!

Employees should not be filming themselves masturbating or holding sex orgies in Parliament House. But there’s a definite hint in all this of feigned outrage beyond what consensual sex acts deserve, however prurient.

We can only assume, the revelations of gay sex come as a welcome distraction to some, currently feeling overwhelmed by the relentless exposure of our moral taskmasters as hypocrites.

QNews chooses not to name either the parliamentary wanker or the whistleblower. Wanking ranks well down the list of egregious behaviour exposed in Australia’s Parliament House of late. And we believe in preserving the anonymity of whistleblowers. Even those who appear a little too focused on blowing their own whistle.

Tom the Whistleblower posted on Twitter that he has lodged a complaint with the Press Council over this morning’s article. Update 04.04.2022: Twitter subsequently suspended the Tom the Whistleblower account.

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