Penis reports: Madge uncut, Kanye obsessed with Pete’s

uncut kanye penis reports pete davidson

In penis reports this weekend, Madonna announces she’s uncut while Charlamagne tha God claims Kanye West is obsessed with Pete Davidson’s dick.

Roll out the cliches. Yep. It’s a slow news day. We’ve been sitting in the newsroom anxiously awaiting an announcement from Hugh Sheridan. Anything! Anything at all will do. Are you there, Hugh? We’re begging. But Hugh’s PR remains spookily quiet. Not a squeak from Jack Vidgen either.

All the news is of crazy British PMs. In truth, we can barely keep up with who has that job, let alone GAF.

Perhaps King Charles is worthy of an article, but let’s face it, seeing that name in print takes some getting used to. I keep wondering why cocker spaniels are making headlines.

So, here’s all the news that’s unfit to print.

First, Her Madgesty

After apparently coming out as gay on social media recently, Madonna has done it again.

“I have a confession to make,” she announced in an Instagram story.

“I was not circumcised.”

Um… okay!

The Material Girl then took off her skirt and placed it foreskin-like around her head.

I have no idea. But people bought the Like a Virgin story. Maybe they’ll believe Madge has a giant uncut schlong.

Then, Kanye

Nationally-syndicated radio host Charlamagne tha God told his listeners that Kanye West is obsessed with Pete Davidson’s penis. He claimed the singer screamed at him on the phone in November, going ‘on and on’ about Davidson.

“‘My wife is out here f_cking a white boy with a 10-inch penis, and you won’t help me?’”

Charlemagne said all he could do was laugh.

“The reason I keep bringing up Pete’s penis on the radio is because I know it f_cks with you, and you said that to me.”

I can’t help thinking Kanye is simply doing a Hugh — keeping himself in the news. Same with Madge. It’s how it works. Exposure equals income. Singers, actors, politicians, and British royals do it. Even comedians do it. Let’s face it. The story that Pete Davidson has a 10-inch penis is far funnier than any joke he ever made.

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Destiny Rogers

Destiny Rogers embarked on her career in the media industry immediately after high school, initially joining Mirror News, which later evolved into News Ltd. She fondly recalls editing Ian Byford's 'Passing Glances: A History of Gay Cairns' as one of her most fulfilling projects. Additionally, Destiny co-researched and co-wrote 'The Queen's Ball', chronicling the history of the world's longest-running continuous queer event. Her investigative work on the history of Australia's COON Cheese and Edward Coon culminated in the publication 'COON: More Holes than Swiss Cheese', a collaborative effort with Dr. Stephen Hagan. Destiny's journey at QNews began as a feature writer, and she was subsequently elevated to the role of Managing Editor of QNews Magazine in 2018. However, in July 2022, she decided to resign from this role to refocus on research and feature writing. For contact, please reach out at

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1 Comment

  1. Peter Turner
    25 October 2022

    Is that really a photo of what Madge now looks like?
    She has had so much work done she looks like a caricature of her former self.
    Apparently no up and coming young female performer will kiss her in public so she has to resort to this drivel in a failed attempt to remain relevant. Sad, terribly sad.

    As for Kanye West….the less said the better!!

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