The evil spawn of the Twitterverse anticipates no event more eagerly than the annual Carols by Candlelight Twitstorm. Twits and half-twits alike choose Carols by Candlelight as the scratching post on which to sharpen their claws. In time-honoured Bitchmas tradition, they gather each 24 December ready to pounce on lyrical, musical or sartorial deviance.
The selection of Eddie McGuire as host in the absence of David Campbell because of COVID restrictions put noses out of joint from the beginning. Surprisingly, a few Eddie McGuire fans did show up on Twitter. Apparently, they were lost — wandered in trying to find their way back to Myspace.
— Eliza Day (@mselizaday) December 24, 2020
McGuire did his best not to sound like a football caller.
However, referring to Anthony Callea leaving nothing in the tank and mispronouncing the singer’s name quickly raised the ire of viewers.
Others fumed at a recitation of stats and introductions possibly gleaned from a quick reading of Wikipedia entries during ad breaks.
Try as she might, Livinia Nixon barely rated a mention with McGuire standing beside her.
— Mr TV Australia (@MrTVAus) December 24, 2020
Eddie McGuire hosting #CarolsByCandlelight
Channel 9 – unable to read the room since 1960
— Hula Hana (@OhHulaHana) December 24, 2020
McGuire’s description of Tim Campbell as ‘versatile’ inspired mirth, whether intended or not.
— I’m just being Miley (@pjk27779) December 24, 2020
Anthony Callea, Casey Donovan and Dami Im killed it
Anthony Callea, Casey Donovan and Dami Im appeared to garner the most approval. Indeed, each of the three turned in stupendous performances.
Ella Hooper, on the other hand, inspired wonderment. One tweet admired that she found inspiration in a meme: dance like no one is watching.
Another made a comparison to a drunk aunt doing karaoke at Christmas while yet another mentioned Peg Bundy.
— Ed (@terkey76) December 24, 2020
Carols by Candlelight Twitstorm unsympathetic to aging icons
Aging performers could not win either way. Bitchmas is after all a celebration all things cruel and cutting.
Therefore those who failed to embrace some form of cosmetic preservation technique copped it for how old they looked.
The remainder, however, fell victim to comments about litres of botox.
— Ed (@terkey76) December 24, 2020
Those familiar with the career of Dennis Walter wondered if the legendary Melbourne singer perhaps now lived under the Carols by Candlelight stage, only emerging annually on 24 December.
However, youthful folk unaware of the former Young Talent Time regular, pondered why the producers included Donald Trump in the line-up.
Some even suggested requesting a presidential pardon for the event.
— Benjamin Norris (@BenjaminJNorris) December 24, 2020
Of course, each year, Anthony Callea famously attempts to out-bling his own previous Christman Eve attire. This year proved no different.
— Michael Couacaud (@MichaelCouacaud) December 24, 2020
How many disco balls died to make Anthony Callea’s jacket? #CarolsByCandlelight
— Michelle 🐿💨 (@MichelleMackey1) December 24, 2020
I was about to turn off #CarolsByCandlelight as I just wasn’t feeling it. Then @AnthonyCallea came on stage looking dynamite, very @prince inspired (I thought). His outfit was dazzling, but more dazzling was his incredible performance. You blew it out of the park, @AnthonyCallea pic.twitter.com/PvNvIqfGEW
— Nothappyjan (@Nothappyjan16) December 24, 2020
I really see myself in Anthony Callea’s outfit…. no, really, I can actually see myself in Anthony Callea’s outfit. #CarolsByCandlelight
— Nathan Brown (@nathanbrown90) December 24, 2020
While the cast of Hamilton dazzled with their talent, many thought the mash-up of ‘Hark the Herald Angels Sing’ and Hamilton lyrics both unnecessary and unimpressive. This writer agreed.
— Channel9 (@Channel9) December 24, 2020
One issue not addressed during the Carols by Candlelight Twitstorm on Bitchmas Day, had QNews positively intrigued.
While QNews would never disagree with the promotion of a safe-sex message, it seemed unusual to include such in a Carols by Candlelight stage set design.
But those condom-motif stained glass windows above the stage were pretty.