A Jewish hairdresser from Perth was shocked after a lesbian couple rejected him as a sperm donor over the Israel-Gaza conflict.
The gay man, Jay Lazarus (above right), said he always wanted to be a sperm donor. He connected with the couple from Queensland online in October 2022.
After taking the “daunting” step, Jay then went through almost a year of medical tests, a health regime and counselling with his partner. By September 2023, he had donated his sperm.
“I was committed to helping them achieve their dream,” he said.
But a text message the couple sent him a month later left him “reeling”. He shared it in a lengthy Instagram post.
The couple expressed “deep gratitude” and acknowledged that he had been “absolutely amazing throughout this entire journey.” But they said they couldn’t proceed due to parts of his “identity” and that they had “ethical challenges” over the “war between Israel and Gaza”.
“We are about kindness and love. Everything we do, say, work towards, is love in action, for every human being. We are sad for Israelis, and we are sad for the Palestinian people, so deeply sad,” they wrote.
“We don’t have the capacity to navigate parts of your identity in this donor relationship, so we are respectfully ending this now.”
Jay wrote it took him a while to process what he’d been told.
“In their words, they couldn’t go through with the process due to ‘ethical challenges’ and their inability to ‘navigate parts of my identity’ — my Jewishness.
“Influenced by what they’ve been told about the conflict between Israel and Hamas, this couple preferred to go back to square one of the sperm donor process rather than accept my Jewish sperm.”
He went on to warn that “antisemitism” is a “breathing prejudice that continues today”.
“I’m proud to be gay, proud to be Jewish, and proud to stand against hate,” he said.
“I will continue to embrace my identity fully and hope for a future where acceptance and understanding prevail.”
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Perth man Jay Lazarus has connected with another couple
Jay Lazarus told OUTinPerth that the interaction was just one incident he’d experienced recently following the outbreak of the conflict.
The gay man, who married his husband in December, said the pair want children of their own in the future.
Jay said it’s therefore important that he helps other couples through sperm donation.
The Perth man has since connected with another couple in his home state, who are trying for a baby.
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