From the Archive: Grindr fails keep on coming

grindr fails

Grindr fails keep on coming, despite no doubt, the best intentions of users. But, people are people, with a range of frailties, and how lucky is that? Otherwise, we’d have nothing to laugh about.

First published September 2, 2019, by Destiny Rogers.

Update by Destiny Rogers December 31, 2023.

Scroll down for the screen grabs

Grindr is home to spammers, scammers, bots, and bigots, but it also offers social and sexual opportunities to millions of men who might not otherwise enjoy access to such.

There are dangers of course. Grindr users sometimes fall victim to thieves and even murderers they meet through the app. But that same risk existed when people met via snail mail. Hooking up, like crossing the street or visiting a shopping centre, presents risks.

However, the secrecy often involved may place people at increased peril.

So folks, just remember to take sensible precautions however you choose to meet people.

Fake Photos

grindr fails


There is nothing new in misleading a potential date on what you look like. Centuries ago, foreign royals regularly forwarded overly flattering portraits of themselves to suitors in far-off lands.

So frequently that monarchs of means like Henry VIII sent their own painters scurrying across Europe to bring back more true-to-life representations of prospective brides.

Many of us must plead guilty to, on occasion, using an old pic that shows us years younger and kilos lighter or filtering an image to the point our mothers wouldn’t recognise us.

Others just use photos of completely different people.

Here’s a hint though.

Don’t use a pic of someone anyone who’s ever gone to the movies or looked at a website will identify at 100 paces on a moonless night.

If Mr. Hemsworth is feeling horny in the former Mrs Hemsworth – Miley’s – absence, I doubt he needs trawl Grindr.

Sometimes, trawling for dick only nets dickheads.

And… another hint…

If you search ‘hunk with abdominal muscle’ on a stock image site for a fake profile pic, crop out the bit that screams ‘Stock Photos’.

Your hookups may be desperate and forgive the deceit.

However, they’ll know what a starfish someone too lazy to crop a pic will prove to be.

grindr fails

The problem with telling lies is, as Granny always said, remembering what you said.

You might blow your chances on a future occasion with a potential hookup who never deleted your previous messages.

grindr fails

Perhaps his dick sees so much action he eroded the missing inch.

Forgetfulness can cause problems in other ways also.

Sometimes players take note of who ignores their messages and tailor the next to suit their target.

Sadly for that dude, the guy who received the message thought what he left out of the second message was what was most appealing about him.

Not Grindr Fails so much as witty bitches.

grindr fails

Ah, Nessie… we’ve missed you.

Sadly, not everyone will prove a perfect match on Grindr or in life.


Finally, some of us like brains and beauty so here’s a guy who sets a comprehension test right from the get-go. How well do you know your emojis?

More Grindr:

Grindr: finding the right tool for the job 💦

Grindrland: “We’ll build a world of our own…”

Fourteen Grindr fails.

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Destiny Rogers

Destiny Rogers embarked on her career in the media industry immediately after high school, initially joining Mirror News, which later evolved into News Ltd. She fondly recalls editing Ian Byford's 'Passing Glances: A History of Gay Cairns' as one of her most fulfilling projects. Additionally, Destiny co-researched and co-wrote 'The Queen's Ball', chronicling the history of the world's longest-running continuous queer event. Her investigative work on the history of Australia's COON Cheese and Edward Coon culminated in the publication 'COON: More Holes than Swiss Cheese', a collaborative effort with Dr. Stephen Hagan. Destiny's journey at QNews began as a feature writer, and she was subsequently elevated to the role of Managing Editor of QNews Magazine in 2018. However, in July 2022, she decided to resign from this role to refocus on research and feature writing. For contact, please reach out at

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