Gay guy pleads for advice after finding homophobic dad on Grindr

grindr logo eyes emoji gay man dad homophobic kyle and jackie o
Image: Grindr/ composite

A gay Australian man has claimed he found his homophobic dad on Grindr and has pleaded for advice over what to do next.

The young man, who called himself Jacob, called into KIIS FM’s Kyle and Jackie O Show this week to share the predicament.

Jacob explained his father stopped talking to him for several years after Jacob came out as gay to him. The two have only recently repaired their relationship, he said.

The man told Kyle and Jackie O of his shock when he identified his father on the gay hook-up app.

Jacob says he was browsing when found a profile with a headless torso pic.

Looking at it closely, he realised the mystery man had taken the photo in the walk-in closet in his parent’s house.

“They have one of those ensuites that are through the walk-in closet,” he said.

“I thought, ‘That looks sort of like my parent’s house.'”

Jacob shocked after confirming it was his dad’s Grindr profile

He scanned the profile, hunting for more clues to try and confirm one way or another. But nothing else on the profile gave his dad away, he said.

So Jacob created a faceless profile and began sending messages to the man.

“I wasn’t flirting with him, I just engaged in normal conversation. I told him I liked his picture and asked where he is from,” he said.

During the chat, the man then sent Jacob a photo of his face. It was his dad.

Jacob explained to Kyle and Jackie O he is “torn”. He explained he doesn’t care about his dad’s sexuality, but he wants him to be honest with his mother.

“I am very open and forward thinking. I don’t care if he is gay, I just don’t want him lying to my mum,” he said.

“So now I am torn. Do I tell mum? Do I confront my dad?”

Listeners react to gay man’s Grindr predicament

Jackie O told Jacob she would have “walked away” from the situation immediately after recognising the house.

But the radio hosts invited calls from listeners, who weighed in on Jacob’s predicament.

“You have to discuss this with both of your parents, they have to be aware,” one said.

Another explained, “My partner had a similar thing happen. His dad had six kids, was a construction manager and appeared happily married.

“Your dad will be happier if he can be true to his real identity.”

But Jacob also shed more light on the situation, revealing his father’s reaction to Jacob’s own coming out.

The gay man said his father was “super angry” and “super against it” when he found out.

“He hated me. He was super angry and didn’t want anything to do with me in his life,” he said.

It’s only recently that the two men were on speaking terms again, Jacob explained.

Reaching that point took a lot of work, and Jacob told the radio hosts it’ll hurt his mother if their relationship is fractured again.

Another listener suggested he talk to his father first before involving his mum.

Jacob ended the radio segment undecided, but explained he did want answers.

“I want to hear his opinion and get his story,” he said.

“I want to know why he has been hiding it from me for so long.”

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1 Comment

  1. Peter Turner
    4 August 2022

    Not funny!

    He gave his son a bad time and disowned him. I would just take a printout of the conversations and post it to his father.

    Let him squirm for a couple of days before having that conversation.

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