Footballers, bro-jobs, a headjob for a bet, and Soggy Sao


footballers head jobs for bets soggy sao

A video of a Victorian footballer giving a teammate a blink-and-you’ll-miss-it headjob made headlines around the world this week. Stories of footballers indulging in bro-jobs, circle jerks, a headjob for a bet, and Soggy Sao are usually dismissed as urban myth or gay fantasy. But not this week!

What is it about supposedly heterosexual footballers and drunken homoerotic bonding rituals?

BTW: Could other football clubs intending to indulge in similar behaviour and post on social media, please use better cameras?

This week’s video shows a footballer going down momentarily on a teammate after losing a bet. From the enthusiastic cheering of assembled teammates, you’d think the footballers had just won a grand final. (Something bitchy social media football experts assure never happened to this particular team.)

There’d be so much less sexual insecurity in the world if everyone who went down on a dick received the same response. Wild applause, prolonged cheering, pats on the back – perhaps fireworks or a ticker tape parade.

But no, usually it’s just ‘Go deeper’, ‘Use your tongue’, ‘Have you chipped a tooth?” or ‘I gave you the cash, didn’t I?’.

Soggy Sao

Known as Soggy Sao in Australia, around the world, people know this particular ritual as ookie cookie, limp biscuit, jizzcuit, or cum on a cookie.

I first heard of Soggy Sao during my high school years. Allegedly, after a long day of board riding, surfies habitually gathered in the dark on isolated beaches for drinking sessions that culminated in group masturbation. Everyone came on the dry biscuit more commonly ingested with a slice of cheese. The last one to cum, ate the biscuit. But why?

Recently I learned Soggy Sao is more often associated in Australia with football players, not the blond 70s gods of the surf I heard about.

But is it real or urban myth? Who knows? Until this week, we never expected to see the headjob for bet video of a footballer gobbling on his mate’s schlong in a public bar.

But then, we also never expected to see a photo of a famous professional footballer performing the Bubbler. Until we did. In 2014, a photo of the young sportsman appearing to piss in his own mouth and pissing away his career went viral.

Boys will be boys

Homoerotic hazing rituals seem to be most commonplace in overtly masculine all-male environs: boarding schools, navies, football teams…

Are the participants straight, gay, bisexual, closeted, latent or just drunk?

I am inclined towards a mixture. After all, someone needs to suggest the activity and something must inspire that suggestion. But drunkenness is also a possibility. Most people have done something drunk they would not do sober.

Otherwise, we are left with the madness of crowds. The mania that causes people to stampede an Aldi sale, vote for Palmer or worship at Hillsong. Yes, the crazy psychological contagion that infects groups of otherwise sensible people and makes irrational behaviour the norm.

Well, that is if you regard giving a teammate head as irrational behaviour. 😉

And now… Good, clean fun: nude vintage Aussie male swimmers.

For the latest lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, intersex and queer (LGBTIQ) news in Australia, visit qnews.com.au. Check out our latest magazines or find us on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and YouTube.

Destiny Rogers

Destiny Rogers embarked on her career in the media industry immediately after high school, initially joining Mirror News, which later evolved into News Ltd. She fondly recalls editing Ian Byford's 'Passing Glances: A History of Gay Cairns' as one of her most fulfilling projects. Additionally, Destiny co-researched and co-wrote 'The Queen's Ball', chronicling the history of the world's longest-running continuous queer event. Her investigative work on the history of Australia's COON Cheese and Edward Coon culminated in the publication 'COON: More Holes than Swiss Cheese', a collaborative effort with Dr. Stephen Hagan. Destiny's journey at QNews began as a feature writer, and she was subsequently elevated to the role of Managing Editor of QNews Magazine in 2018. However, in July 2022, she decided to resign from this role to refocus on research and feature writing. For contact, please reach out at destinyr@qnews.com.au.

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